Where Does She Find The Time?

Hustle.

One of the things I am most frequently asked is how do you find the time? The trick, I think, is to find what you love and go after it, without roadblocking or discouraging yourself. Some things I do to help myself along my path.

I make lists.

I keep a clean house.

I group tasks and errands.

I ignore the phone and the internet.

I set limits on how much time I will give to a task.

I triage.

I do things that I love and work most days.

I don't work at all some days.

I make choices.

I have a clear vision of my goals and obligations.

I allow my vision to shift with necessity.

I break tasks into component parts.

I start early.

I plan ahead.

I expect the unexpected.

I hustle.

How do you find the time? Share your answers in the comments.

All Troubles Are Troubles

Words.

An old friend going through a life experience that pretty much makes the rest of us feel like whiners about whatever it is we are facing had this to share with us:

Some days its easier than others to recognize that all troubles, no matter how trifle comparatively, are troubles. Its okay to feel that way. Its okay to recognize a broken nail as a trouble, a forest fire, a difficult to cash check, a long light, a ship wreck...etc. All troubles. All important in their way. If we try to pretend all things are insignificant in comparison to something else, we miss part of this experience. Instead, I measure troubles in the moment and honor them all before moving on.

Validating and true. Comparison and judgement do nothing to help us down our paths. Rather, they cast shadows and lead us into the tangled brambles of self judgement, doubt, and fear. There is no way round your challenges, only through. So face them, one by one.

The Shiny Toy

Perspective.

Ten years ago I would never have known or cared if some guy from high school that I was not even particularly friends with got married in a western-themed three day wedding. I would not have any idea how many people from that same high school went on to marry each other, or have large broods of children, or that they named them all in odd nouveau riche fashion.  I would not watch the tragedies of illness and accident play out in these peoples lives, instead learning about them, perhaps, as a footnote to another conversation with someone with whom I have an actual relationship. "Did you hear about so and so?" "Oh, that's too bad." Now though, I do know about these things. I see the happenings of all kinds of people to whom I am not really connected, but I do not really share in them, nor is it my place to. That person that friended me on Facebook after not calling for eight years is probably just satisfying either their ego (how many friends do you have?) or some kind of morbid curiosity (can you believe she looks like that now?). While I appreciate the opportunity to say a few kind words to an old friend or donate money to a good cause, I wonder if any of this is tangible, if any of the connections are real. More and more I find the shiny toy of social media useful only for the passing along of information, largely to and from people with whom I have no emotional connection. It serves as a wonderful newsletter and bulletin board and promotional tool, but falls short in maintaining any kind of real connection or friendship. I shudder to think that people who pay attention to my Facebook page believe they understand anything about who I am or how I live my life. 

Perhaps today is a good day to reconsider the role of social media in our lives, particularly with respect to the assumptions we make about other people, who and how they are, and whether or not we are actually maintaining a friendship with them. Consider the people in your life that really matter, then pick up the phone and actually speak to them, you will both be glad for it.

Picture:

  http://momsparkmedia.com/big-hugs-elmo-twitter-party-monday-august-12-2013-at-300pm-et-bighugselmo-partner/

The Year Of F*ck You

2014.

I do not typically make New Year's resolutions and I find the middle of winter a poor time for making new starts, but this year, I feel ready for a change. You see, while never a perfect person, I have spent most of my life trying to please people and this year, I'm sick of it. So I have declared 2014 to be my year of f*ck you. No more feeling guilty for things I did not do. No more pandering to drama queens and tiptoeing around people that can dish it but can't take it. This year, I intend to stand up for myself, at least internally. Are you that guy that was mean to me for two years because you thought I said something I never said? F*ck you. The good friend that burned bridges on her way out of town that doesn't have the balls to mend them when they return? F*ck you. The person who's artwork I spent time and money supporting just to have you never pay me for my work in return? F*ck you too. I just cannot internalize it anymore, small slights, the person that steps in front of me in the bakery line, big righteous rudeness, the women who claim my life has no purpose because I don't have children, the guy that condescends to me at the electronics store. F*ck you all. I am doing the best I can in this world and have reached the conclusion that I would be doing even better if I didn't give the group of you-all any time or attention whatsoever. So this year, instead of seeing your bad behavior and blaming myself or thinking I can or should "fix it", I am just walking away to spend my time with less toxic people. Good riddance.

Would Have Been Nice To Know

Really.

Some days I go out into the world and interact with people and witness the process of all of us trying to make it through our days and I am astounded by how very many of our interactions are exactly as they were in say, the third grade. I am usually surprised by my irritation, I mean, this is clearly the way of the world. Somehow though, in all my education, I missed that piece, the part about some things just never changing. There will always be the kid that picks on people, the one that cheats or steals, the pleaser, the line cutter, and the outcast. People will still fight over shiny toys, equal division of attention and property and they will still stick their tongues out at one another. Today what gives me hope is the idea that if those childhood vestiges still exist perhaps so do wonder, playful abandon, easy friendship, and heartfelt apologies. Today I ask myself, which inner child will you choose to carry today?

"The most sophisticated people I know-inside they are all children." Jim Henson

Me Too Iguana

Unique.

One of my favorite books as a child was Me Too Iguana. Written by Jaquelyn Reinach, it was part of the Sweet Pickles series which featured a friendly city populated entirely by animals. My memory is that there where 26 books in all, one for each letter of the alphabet, and that they could be purchased via mail. The books arrived in a school bus shaped box with a lunch pail handle so you could take them with you wherever you wished. They were great. 

Each book focused on a particular moral or ethical quandary or life lesson with a different animal as the primary character. My favorite was Iguana. In Iguana's book, Me Too Iguana, Iguana has low self esteem. She thinks that she would be prettier with Lion's long mane or Zebra's stripes and goes to great lengths, manufacturing a mane out of a mop head and painting herself with stripes, to be like the other animals. It seems wherever Iguana goes, she wants what others have, if for no other reason than they have is and she does not.

Finally, because it is Sweet Pickles land, her friends become worried about her. So the animals decide to throw a big costume party and invite Iguana so she knows how much they like her. Iguana, of course, makes a costume mashing up the best attributes of her friends. Her friends, they ALL DRESS UP LIKE IGUANA so that she knows that they think she is beautiful and worth emulating too. In the end, she decides that her green skin and spinal bumps are pretty cool after all.

I think we all have a lot to learn from Iguana. It is easy, especially in this digital age to see what others have and think, "Me too! Me too!" But your life and body and path are yours and yours alone and no amount of copy catting or imitation will turn you into someone else. Each one of us possesses valuable and desirous traits, we should lean into these things, not grasp at the strengths of others. 

Be authentic,

Photograph:

http://www.rachelswartley.com/2011/05/05/me-too-iguana/

On Being A Gentleman

Gallantry.

The companion list, for men that want to be gentlemen in the modern age.

1) Call. A text is not the same. A phone call shows that you care and that the other person has value.

2) Open the door. Really. This small act of deference and others like it (pulling out a chair, offering a coat) will never go out of style.

3) Keep it to yourself. The guys do not need to know the details of your date, so keep it to yourself and allow her to retain her dignity, especially if you intend to keep her around.

4) Own a suit. Job interviews, weddings, and funerals still happen and a good suit lasts for years. Sometimes it is just important to look the part. Be prepared.

5) Pick up a check. Not all of them, but some, and especially in the beginning. It will set you apart and establish you as having generosity.

6) Listen. Most women want to be acknowledged by their companions, so listen and respond so that she feels important and intelligent.

7) Lend a hand. To the older woman hauling groceries to her door, the guy that has a flat tire, or the neighbor that needs the snow cleared from their walkway. Small acts of kindness are the mark of a true gentleman. 

8) Avoid discussing money and purchases. Verbal one-upmanship and boasting never impress the way they are intended to and only produce resentment in your listeners. Be cautious about money discussions and sensitive to others' situations. 

9) Know your limits. Stop drinking before you pick a fight, start an argument, become boorish, or have to be escorted home by your date. Everyone else will remember the incident far better and longer than you will. It's just not worth it.

Photograph:

http://malgeo.blogspot.com/2013/01/winters-styles-for-gentlemen-in-1867.html

On Being A Lady

Grace.

There is some fuss about a post going around the interweb which lays out guidelines for being a gentleman and a lady in 2014. I think most of it is utter nonsense, but I appreciate the attempt. My own version, in no particular order.

1) Learn how to cook. Your parents will not always be around to make holiday meals so you need to be prepared to take over that task. Also, having something home-made to bring to events shows that you are human, and you care. Finally, cooking at home is cheaper, healthier, and provides important family time.

2) Say please, thank you, and excuse me. Frequently.

3) Do no post pictures of yourself or your friends drinking or drunk. Also, do not take to social media to rant. About anything. The internet is forever.

4) Be a hostess. Whether this means book group, a dinner party, or just having a friend over for a cup of tea, reach out and invite people to your home.

5) Do not discuss politics, religion, or lifestyle choices unless in company that you are sure already agree with you.

6) Stay home when you or your children are sick. In the post-antibiotic age, prevention will be the key to all of our health. Do your part and do not pass your bug along.

7) Say positive things to and about yourself and others.

8) Send thank you cards. For all the weddings and baby showers I went to in my twenty's I do not think I received a single actual thank you card. It is not a bygone era, thanks never goes out of style, and it makes you stand out for your efforts.

9) Master a craft or fine art. There was a time when women were expected to be able to embroider, now, we are expected to have no artistic skills whatsoever. It is a shame, and shows a lack of effort, interests, and refinement. So play the piano or paint or make bread, but have a craft and become good at it.

10) Keep your cooter to yourself. This includes when getting out of cars, at beaches, on the interweb, on stage, and generally whenever anyone else is around :-) Just sayin'.

Picture:

http://www.fabsugar.com.au/Miranda-Kerr-Does-Ladylike-Terry-Richardson-Harper-Bazaar-April-2012-Issue-See-her-Pose-Up-Storm-Little-Italy-22258994

Knock Out

Game.

There is a quiet roar beginning over what is being called the "teen knockout game" wherein a group of teens randomly assaults a complete stranger with the intent of knocking them unconscious. My interest in this is less in discussing teen violence or the pack mentality that drives it, but in the mainstream medias willingness to diminish their actions by calling it a game. That our young people are unable to tell the difference between games and criminal violence is certainly a problem, but when the rest of society struggles with that same distinction, it's indicative of something larger and more deeply ingrained. Are we, as a while, losing the ability to distinguish between play, imagination, fantasy, and reality? Have movies and video games so closely blended with our daily realities that we are no longer sure what is, in fact, a game? In considering this question I think about the many US service people who daily fight wars, remotely, with drones and joystick technology and then return to their suburban lives. I think about fight clubs, the violence of football and hockey, and the ways in which we celebrate the champions of these violent form of recreation. I wonder about boredom in our youth, and the obvious cry for stimulation that is calling a random attack on a stranger a game. I think about stories like The Hunger Games and Game of Thrones that place children in positions of power and reward them for their violence. I think about my own youth, filled with capture the flag and kick the can, and think about a time when dodge ball was considered too violent for the school grounds. Perhaps today is a good day to reevaluate our pastimes, recreation, and personal media choices. What do they say about ourselves and what we consider to play? What message do your choices send to those around you about violence and its role as an entertainer?

Photograph:

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/crime/teen-knockout-game-continues-harm-innocent-people-article-1.1521185

Business As Usual

Suits.

There is something uniquely impressive about the American businessman. It is something in the way they stride, purposefully pulling their roller cases, designed especially for their needs, the sense of import they impart as the flick up the sleeve of their neatly pressed shirts to check the time on their polished watches. I love to listen in as they conduct meetings on their phones, issuing orders, making deals, doing business. I also appreciate their diligence and commitment to multitasking, unable or willing to simply look out the window and watch the planes the roll in, instead in a constant flutter of phone and laptop. I smile at the way they rush, only to get stuck in the same lines and stalling points as the vacationers with nothing better to do than toddle slowly through the terminals. The United States was built on the backs of men like these, determined, ambitious, driven forward, towards success, power, and promised wealth. I wonder though, about their health, their hearts furiously pumping, the veins in their temples always visibly pulsing. And I wander about their happiness, if their diligence can purchase joy or a life well-lived. I wonder, if born to a different time or place, a different set of expectations and ambitions, what they might do, or who they might become. I wonder, if released from these things, would it still be business as usual?

Picture:

http://www.jcdecaux-oneworld.com/2013/10/eye-on-business-travellers-studies-show-strong-belief-that-advertising-belongs-in-airports/

Put Down Your Phone

Call.

Put down your phone. Just put it down. It isn't helping you. You are not more connected, more organized or more present in your life. You are not good at multitasking. You are not paying attention or participating or really enjoying anything through the view of that tiny computer. Your life is not better or richer, it is more complicated and busy and full of stuff and you should really just put down your phone. You do not need to comment or like or send a text to let someone know you are running late. They will wait or not but that message probably won't change anything so you might as well just put down your phone. You do not need to record every moment of your life or constantly be playing a game. You carry with you a far more complex and amazing machine called your brain and you should try using it to store, retrieve, and create things. You should put down your phone. 

Photograph:

http://blogs.houstonpress.com/rocks/2012/07/should_cell_phones_and_cameras.php

Sweet Silence

Quiet.

The world woke up cold today. The pines were still snuggled under their blanket of fog as we headed back towards town. For the first 36 miles we did not pass even a single car or speak more than a few words. Instead, we took the time be take in the bright blue of the sky, the gentle lilt of the trees, and the newly snow capped peaks. We held the silence between us, glad to share the morning with each other and a thermos of hot coffee. We looked forward, down the road, each of us mulling the tasks of our week, grateful for the time to think, grateful for each other. Sometimes the best thing we have to gift each other is silence; take some for yourself today.

Photograph:

www.rubygonewild.com

Thirty Days of Thanks

Giving.

There is a modern tradition developing of expressing 30 days of public gratitude during the month of November. It is one of the few soulful consequences of social media I have witnessed and, I think, an important and healthy use of our technology and inter-connectedness. There is documented and scientific evidence pointing to the role of gratitude and its expression in the health of our relationships and ourselves. I believe that we can take that one step farther and say that the expression of gratitude is a pathway to peace.  In gratitude we recognize the compassion and value of the world around us and the people in our lives. To express gratitude is to recognize each others humanity and our own needs. It is a fundamental step in recognizing both how we wish to be treated and the way we wish to be in the world. It is worth speaking it out loud.

I am thankful for:

My health.

My relationship with my parents.

The fire.

My home and the person I share it with.

The love of a good cat.

Hot tea.

Friends that call.

Hot running water.

Employment.

My ballet class.

Hugs.

The massage therapist that is fixing my back.

Outdoor pools.

Sun breaks.
The cabin in the woods.

Writing.

Public broadcasting.

The silence function on phones.

Online banking.

People that give me a chance.

Black Magdalene.

My students.

Mac and cheese.

The people that listen.

Puzzles.

My pen pals.

Strangers that are kind to me.

Yoga.

Authors whose books I fall into.

Serendipity and random acts of kindness.

Good food and folks to share it with.

Please share some things that you are thankful for:

Photograph Courtesy of:

www.rubygonewild.com

Unplugged And Happy

Analog.

Ten days is not actually a very long time, but in the age of electronica, taking that much time away from both one's phone and email is regarded by many as self-abuse or some kind of act of aggression towards others.  I think that it is bliss.  Not surprisingly, the world continues to turn without my online participation.  Cat videos and selfies are still posted, dry sarcasm does not fade away, and anyone that really needs to get in touch with me manages to do so.  What is more valuable is the reminder of just how few people really need to get in touch with me.  The internet has a way of amplifying our importance, even if only in our own minds, when really we are still creatures of close-knit families and communities and just because we are able to communicate all the time, in real time, does not mean that we need to or should.  We are not as important and we would like to believe and I take great solace in that knowledge.  Put down your phone, turn off your computer, go outside, whatever it is can wait until later.

One More Time Around

Deja.

For me, the end of summer and beginning of fall has always marked the start of the new year. Perhaps it is because of the startling change of season, or the start of school, or the arrival of my birthday, but I always take this time of year to reflect on the previous twelve months and set some goals for the next twelve.  With that in mind, and before taking a brief travel hiatus, this week I want to revisit some of the most-read posts and a couple of my favorites from this year.  I hope you enjoy them the second time around.  Thanks for reading.

Also! Keep an eye out for the beginning of my Kickstarter campaign to fund the completion of my Girl Gone Wild book about being a woman in the wilderness, your support, financial or promotional by passing the word, will be much appreciated. 

From February, the most-read post this year:

Lost.

In 2006 Joyce Carol Vincent was found dead in her London flat.  The cause of death was not determined due to the advanced state of decomposition of her body.  Joyce was 38 years old when she died.  Her body had lain undisturbed in her flat for nearly three years.  The story of Joyce, what there is to know and tell has been documented in the film Dreams of a Life.  

Joyce was not a shut-in, had no history of mental illness of drug abuse, and had three living sisters.  She was widely described as beautiful , vibrant, and successful.  By all accounts from those that knew her, it is as though the Joyce they knew simply slipped away; they seemed unable to reconcile the woman in the flat with the person they had known.  Contrary to the image of a recluse she was found surrounded by freshly wrapped Christmas presents; there must have been people in her life.

While there is something morbidly compelling about the unresolved cause of her death and the grim tableau of how she was found, the more disturbing element of this story is the three year wait before her discovery.  Where were family, friends, and coworkers?  Where were the neighbors or the mailman? Where, even, were the bill collectors? In the end, it took even the landlords three years to come and clear her out for unpaid rent.  

I think that the we learn more about ourselves in Joyce's story than we learn about her.  When she died in 2003 we were pre-Facebook and post nuclear-family.  2003 was right in the transition point between the constant connections of the social media age and the isolation and lack of community of the end of the 20th Century.  Three years? How can this be? It is not hard for me to imagine friends of mine disappearing and not being noticed for three or four months.  The free spirits, wanderers, or troubled souls, but three years? There is no one I know or have ever known that was in any way functional that could disappear from all things for three years and not have someone ring the bell.  

What are we to think of this?   Is Joyce some kind of social canary warning us of the dangers of our modernity? Is it an isolated case; one sad woman's quiet decline?  Is it possible that we have reached a place where people can live out their lives with no real connections?  How acceptable is distance between family members?  How important is the building of community? How long do you want to wait before someone finds you? 

This terrifies me.  Joyce's story tapped into some deeply rooted fears about mortality and loneliness.  I think that we all have these fears.  It's why we bother to call up old friends, love and lose and love again, and hassle our way through the holidays to spend time with family; so that when things go awry, someone is there to help us.  Somewhere along the line either Joyce stopped bothering, or everyone else did.  Probably a little of both.  I think a consequence of contemporary culture may be the devaluing of substantive connections with other people.  I think that we are all not so far away from being Joyce as we might like to believe.

Like what you are reading?  Then support the Kickstarter for my book Girl Gone Wild- On Being a Woman in the Wilderness.  Thanks!

http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1731666363/girl-gone-wild-a-guide-to-being-a-woman-outside?ref=city

References/Works Cited:

Dreams of a Life:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/film/movie/144079/dreams-of-a-life

Photo:

http://images.popmatters.com/misc_art/f/film-dreamslife-splsh.jpg

The Heat of Summer

Fever.

Every couple of summers or so I pick up a summer flu or infection of some kind that knocks me onto the couch and under blankets.  Though summer sicknesses never seem to linger the way a winter bug will, it always feels somehow worse than in other seasons.  I know that this is entirely psychological.  Summer is the season of fun and vacations and running around outside, not the season of tea and cuddling up in the early evening, being sick isn't in the plan.  What is valuable though, is the reminder that true illness or injury, major accidents, cancer, diabetes, is never in the plan, they have no convenient season.  While spending a day or two watching movies and sipping soup might be a summer in the sunny season, days of doctors appointments, treatments with debilitating side effects, and week to months of recovery is far worse.  Losing even a day or two, seeing how quickly we fall behind in life, how much there is to miss, is a really good reminder to take good care of ourselves.  Prevention is a practice that is entirely within our control, even if it's not something that is fostered by our dominant culture.

Be well.  Stay healthy.  Make good choices.

Daily Dose

Nod.

Drug overdose is now the leading cause of accidental death in the United States.  I suspect that if you were to tally up the deaths related to drugs in other ways, violence, suicide, and accidents, the numbers would be shocking.  Because of the inherently secretive nature of recreational drug use in the U.S. and the persistent anti-drug messaging and politically correct avoidance of the topic, it is really difficult to grasp the enormity of just how many people are doing drugs, and how many of them struggle with it.  Not that doing drugs is a necessarily bad thing, I think that the dominant culture does not allow for enjoyment, recreation, or excitement in the daily lives of most people and turning to a drink or some other kind of "helper" is a reasonable, if not necessarily healthy response.  I also think that far more people than we would like to admit are struggling with the repercussions of their drug use.  I grew up in the Nancy Reagan "Just Say No to Drugs" era, though from what I can tell, hardly anybody paid any attention.  What it did do though, was stigmatize drug use to the point of preventing people from asking for help, or offering it, earlier.  We have a tendency of waiting until someones life has spiraled out of control before intervening, which is part of the tough love and rock bottom philosophy of drug treatment, but is likely more rooted in our sense of not invading another persons life.  Perhaps we need to change the paradigm.  Instead of a war on drugs, a black and white, either-or, right and wrong way of looking at drug use, which pushes it farther out of sight, we could usher in an era of moderation and a way of living that requires less escape.  Perhaps a little more time off, a little extra income, and some healthy activities would lessen our reliance on drugs for relaxation and fun.  Because really, wouldn't it be nice to just not need it?

To look at a long list of celebrities with drug problems:

http://www.cnn.com/2013/07/15/health/addiction-relapse-cory-monteith/index.html?hpt=hp_t3

Photograph Courtesy of:

http://theragblog.blogspot.com/2010/04/john-ross-us-mexico-and-drug-war-scam.html

Life on Easy Street

Unplug.

It is remarkable what a few days away from traffic and deadlines, and cell phones, and the internet can do to calm ones mind and bring things back into perspective.  Fresh air, warm summer lake water, and dinners cooked over an open fire go a long way towards reminding us just how simple things can be and just how good the good life really is.  So much of our stress, discomforts, and drama is manufactured by modern life, Facebook, the constant chirping of the phone, errands, that we forget that these modern trappings are voluntary and largely unnecessary.  I think we forget too to make sure that they are serving a higher purpose in our lives, and if they are not, we forget that we can let them go.  The world does not come crashing down if we do not check our email and all those other things that we are told are so important.  These modern gadgets used to be called conveniences, and we were promised they would save us time, make life more efficient so that we would have more time for the good life.  In my experience these things only consume more and more of my time, pulling me away from the people and experiences that make me truly happy.  In my experience the good life does not come in packaging or with bells and whistles, it comes in summer evenings, with people you care for, far from the crush and noise of the daily grind.  

It is time.  Go outside. Ignore your phone.  Soak up the sun.  Happy summer.

Photograph courtesy of:

http://coloradocreates.com/scapes-at-studio-12-gallery/dianna-fritzler_the-good-life/

Keeping Up With The Joneses

Stuff.

I have never really been a shopper or a collector of things and have never had the good fortune to be able to afford to conspicuously consume nor the bad luck to really want for things.  It has been at least a year since I have set foot in a shopping mall.  I personally believe that my car says no more about who I am or what I have achieved in my life than any other common object.  While I have always known about the American consumer culture and even had some idea of the extent to which it permeates our lives, it was only recently that I began to see just how invested people are in it.  Some part of me, while understanding the idea of car or house or clothing as a status symbol, was simply unable to understand the enormity of these things in determining the average persons sense of self, worth, and accomplishment.  But it really matters.  People go into enormous amounts of debt and end up losing their families and homes and ability to take out credit accumulating stuff and things.  People spend large parts of their daily lives shopping, preparing to shop, or thinking about the things that other people have accumulated while out shopping.  They sacrifice their family and leisure time for jobs they hate so that they can continue to afford to buy even more stuff and things.  They feel badly about themselves in the wake of other peoples stuff and things.

When was the last time you went more than 24 hours without spending money?  It's possible.

Photograph Courtesy of:

http://www.cambio.com/2012/04/25/keeping-up-with-the-kardashians-renewal-a-40-million-dea/

Outside In

Porch.

I love to take a neighborhood walk.  I think it is good for the body and soul and goes a long way towards building a sense of place, community, and the need to care for both.  I am, however, increasingly concerned about the lack of children in the street and out in yards, really the lack of any people at all.  I walk for miles through neighborhoods with carefully crafted and beautifully maintained gardens, miles of lawn, and thousands of dollars of outdoor furniture; I never see a soul.  I am alone in walking, alone in enjoying the fresh evening air, and apparently alone in believing that children are better off for being sent to play outside. This saddens and concerns me, but more than anything it leaves me confused.  Why bother with the nice house, the fancy yard, and the expensive barbecue if  you will not use or enjoy it?  Have we crossed so far into our consumer and electronics driven culture that even our verandas have become little more than status symbols?

Take a walk.  Take a meal outside.  Take a break from modernity and sit on your very own front porch.

Photograph of Mark Twain Porch Sitting:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Porch_sitting